Everyone's doing their best
This statement can really help to shift our nervous system state when we’re struggling with children’s behaviour. I think there are few,...
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elainenichollsnvr
Aug 22 min read
No matter what!
Relationship gestures - a fancy term for all the things we do that keep us deeply connected to our children - are fundamental to NVR. A...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 292 min read
The problem with praise
If you want your kids to feel good about themselves then let them overhear you tell other people good things about them - the ways...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 282 min read
The language of children's harmful behaviour
The terminology around children's harmful behaviour is tricky and language matters. The language we use influences whether families...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 92 min read
Kind stories
This is a really hard one for parents/carers of children who struggle to regulate their emotions or manage their behaviour in safe and...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 51 min read
Letting go
There's a lot of letting go in NVR. One of the things we can let go of is the idea that we're responsible for the actions and responses...
elainenichollsnvr
Jun 231 min read
Mindful parenting
I’ve been doing a lot of driving lately - a lot - and I’ve been listening to audiobooks to make the most of the time. So far I’m still on...
elainenichollsnvr
Jun 141 min read
Creating the conditions for felt safety
I love this but… Yes - and no. Let’s keep the measure of success to things we can control. Children with significant levels of trauma,...
elainenichollsnvr
Jun 102 min read
You can't do everything
I don’t believe we can do everything. Actually, I don't believe we can do anything either. I have my limitations and I believe we all do....
elainenichollsnvr
May 301 min read
Parental presence
This to me is parental presence. Everything we do (and don't do) influencing their development, influencing their values, influencing the...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 252 min read
Triggers and glimmers
Sometimes we know how we want to deal with things as parents. We know what we need to do and what we should avoid doing. We can picture...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 171 min read
Self care
Being told to make space for self care when things are difficult can feel shallow & it can highlight just how little people understand...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 71 min read
It takes a village
It takes a village to raise a child, any child, but especially a traumatised child. We can’t do it alone. We need other people who can...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 62 min read
Realistic therapeutic parenting
Parenting is hard. Really hard. Therapeutic parenting is beyond hard. In all the therapeutic parenting advice (specific to...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 42 min read
Birthdays
Birthdays can be interesting times in adoptive families (whatever the legal framework - adoption, fostering, or kinship care). Loss can...
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