It’s not about what happened to us as children
One of my favourite quotes is from one of Dan Siegel’s earlier books - parenting from the inside out. He explains that it isn’t what...
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elainenichollsnvr
Oct 312 min read
Disenfranchised grief in adoption
Disenfranchised grief in adoption (and other similar family set ups) is a topic close to my heart - grief that society (and often family)...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 72 min read
Children who need love the most...
Parenting is hard. Really hard. Therapeutic parenting is beyond hard. In all the therapeutic parenting advice (specific to...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 51 min read
Everyone's doing their best
This statement can really help to shift our nervous system state when we’re struggling with children’s behaviour. I think there are few,...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 292 min read
The problem with praise
If you want your kids to feel good about themselves then let them overhear you tell other people good things about them - the ways...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 282 min read
The language of children's harmful behaviour
The terminology around children's harmful behaviour is tricky and language matters. The language we use influences whether families...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 92 min read
Kind stories
This is a really hard one for parents/carers of children who struggle to regulate their emotions or manage their behaviour in safe and...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 42 min read
Disability support
Did you know that you can apply for disability living allowance (PIP) if your child needs help above and beyond what would typically be...
elainenichollsnvr
Jun 301 min read
The measure of parenting success
A quote by lived experience trauma therapist Glenn Patrick Doyle - "We're not ourselves when we're triggered. We become who we think we...
elainenichollsnvr
May 301 min read
Parental presence
This to me is parental presence. Everything we do (and don't do) influencing their development, influencing their values, influencing the...
elainenichollsnvr
May 251 min read
I'm so sorry
Apologies cover a multitude of parent mistakes and parent dysregulation. We all have ‘stuff’ that drives everything from behind the...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 261 min read
Get a dog
If you have a teenager, or a handful of teenagers, you'll know that teenagers aren't very often pleased to see us. If your self worth was...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 171 min read
Self care
Being told to make space for self care when things are difficult can feel shallow & it can highlight just how little people understand...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 81 min read
Tolerating big feelings
If there’s one thing children provide parents with it’s the opportunity for growth. Plenty of growth. Especially if we're parenting...
elainenichollsnvr
Apr 42 min read
Birthdays
Birthdays can be interesting times in adoptive families (whatever the legal framework - adoption, fostering, or kinship care). Loss can...
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