A Trauma-informed Christmas
As we get ready for the magic of Christmas, here’s a helpful list for mums and dads - a reminder that the joyful season isn’t always so...
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elainenichollsnvr
Nov 232 min read
NVR - evidence base and adaptability
NVR as a parenting approach was developed in the 1990s to help parents take a firm stance around harmful behaviours - like drugs,...
elainenichollsnvr
Nov 191 min read
What's the story?
The stories we tell ourselves matter. Whether emotions shape our narrative or our narrative shapes our emotions is up for debate. But one...
elainenichollsnvr
Nov 172 min read
How to be angry
Let’s face it - expressions of anger in our children can be overwhelming. The shouting, stomping, crashing and banging. The “I hate you...
elainenichollsnvr
Oct 241 min read
Working with the system
Today started with a school meeting. Usually, families are referred to NVR to learn different ways to parent in very difficult...
elainenichollsnvr
Sep 302 min read
Accept your humanity
Some children need ‘Superparents’ - the premise of Amber Elliot’s book for therapeutic parents. But striving to be the perfect parent for...
elainenichollsnvr
Sep 212 min read
NVR parenting - warm and firm
Deciding where to set our expectations for our children can be tricky when there's trauma, disabilities, and other things going on like...
elainenichollsnvr
Sep 111 min read
Where there's family violence there's shame
Where there’s family violence, there’s shame. Children can be violent and aggressive for all sorts of reasons. For some children big...
elainenichollsnvr
Sep 102 min read
Two things can be true
Those of us parenting children who’ve experienced relational trauma can sometimes struggle to decide how to respond to behaviours that...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 252 min read
Self-fulfilling prophecy in NVR
I love this quote by Karyn Purvis - an expert in developmental trauma, attachment difficulties, and therapeutic approaches. She was one...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 232 min read
NVR chat - follow up group for parents
Today I did something I've been meaning to do for a while. I set up a Facebook group for parents who've completed an NVR parent group...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 212 min read
Things I manage not to say
Children’s brains are wired differently to adult brains. The bits of the brain that help us manage our emotions and impulses, reflect on...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 192 min read
Say yes to the feelings
This right here is the key to therapeutic parenting - saying yes to the feelings (or ideas, or thoughts, or wishes, or drives) while also...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 152 min read
Grades don't define you
A level results in our house today. I’m in awe of those that did well and in awe of those that didn’t do so well. It’s difficult for...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 141 min read
Collaborative problem solving
Collaborative conversations are a fundamental part of NVR parenting and NVR approaches in schools. Starting from a belief that everyone's...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 132 min read
Can I use consequences in NVR parenting?
Parents often ask if it's okay to use consequences in NVR parenting. Consequences are part of life. We can't avoid them. Consequences are...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 72 min read
Children who need love the most...
Parenting is hard. Really hard. Therapeutic parenting is beyond hard. In all the therapeutic parenting advice (specific to...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 51 min read
Everyone's doing their best
This statement can really help to shift our nervous system state when we’re struggling with children’s behaviour. I think there are few,...
elainenichollsnvr
Aug 22 min read
No matter what!
Relationship gestures - a fancy term for all the things we do that keep us deeply connected to our children - are fundamental to NVR. A...
elainenichollsnvr
Jul 282 min read
The language of children's harmful behaviour
The terminology around children's harmful behaviour is tricky and language matters. The language we use influences whether families...
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