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elainenichollsnvr
Nov 16, 20241 min read
From 'carnage' to calm
Finished an incredible journey with a neurodivergent family this week. We started working together about a year ago. At that point every...

elainenichollsnvr
Nov 11, 20241 min read
Glimmers - micro moments of joy
Glimmers are those tiny, magical moments that make us feel peace, joy, safety, and connection. They make us feel alive. We often don't...

elainenichollsnvr
Nov 10, 20241 min read
Adoption reform
A recent report commissioned by the Public Law Working Group recommends that - where it is safe and in the best interests of children -...


elainenichollsnvr
Oct 31, 20242 min read
Disenfranchised grief in adoption
Disenfranchised grief in adoption (and other similar family set ups) is a topic close to my heart - grief that society (and often family)...


elainenichollsnvr
Oct 24, 20241 min read
Working with the system
Today started with a school meeting. Usually, families are referred to NVR to learn different ways to parent in very difficult...


elainenichollsnvr
Oct 19, 20243 min read
Family values - compliance to commitment
I have great respect for Brene Brown & love her perspective here. She’s all about family values - taking children on a loving journey...

elainenichollsnvr
Oct 18, 20242 min read
Emotion Coaching
Emotion coaching has come up a few times this week in work with parents. When the first emotion we see and feel from our children is...


elainenichollsnvr
Oct 13, 20242 min read
Different types of self care
It’s very unusual for us to have a day out that’s not on the beach or in a field - the highlight being a cup of tea from a tin kettle in...

elainenichollsnvr
Oct 11, 20242 min read
Supporting the teachers of our children
Haim Ginott was a teacher, educational psychologist, child psychotherapist, parent educator, and loving stepfather. He was also a...


elainenichollsnvr
Oct 9, 20241 min read
Parental presence when we're burnt out...
I'm delivering an NVR group at the moment and this morning we were thinking about increasing our presence (in their minds and hearts)...

elainenichollsnvr
Oct 3, 20241 min read
Life story conversations with kinship children
Yesterday I had the honour and the privilege of spending the day with a group of kinship carers - thinking together about the difficult...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 30, 20242 min read
Accept your humanity
Some children need ‘Superparents’ - the premise of Amber Elliot’s book for therapeutic parents. But striving to be the perfect parent for...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 23, 20242 min read
Pulling together through the difficult times
I've got NVR groups underway, new individual families as well as existing families, I’m just restarting university for the second/last...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 21, 20242 min read
NVR parenting - warm and firm
Deciding where to set our expectations for our children can be tricky when there's trauma, disabilities, and other things going on like...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 15, 20241 min read
Learning to feel safe
Learning to feel safe after a lifetime of being on guard is going to take time. In adoption, fostering, or kinship care - “a lifetime of...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 14, 20241 min read
Your old self has no say
We all make mistakes as parents. We all have regrets. We all feel shame sometimes. Give yourself permission to move on from the parent...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 13, 20241 min read
Everything that irritates
Carl Jung said everything that irritates us about others can lead us to a better understanding of ourselves. It’s true. Sometimes things...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 12, 20241 min read
If the only tool we have is a hammer...
If the only tool you have is a hammer, it's tempting to treat every problem as though it were a nail. A quote often attributed to Abraham...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 11, 20241 min read
Where there's family violence there's shame
Where there’s family violence, there’s shame. Children can be violent and aggressive for all sorts of reasons. For some children big...

elainenichollsnvr
Sep 10, 20241 min read
World suicide prevention day
Suicidal thoughts and feelings can be the reality of life for lots of people for lots of reasons - an ongoing struggle. Telling somebody...
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